This week's Listography on Kate takes 5 is bad combinations. What things just don't go together. You'll see a common theme in my list.
1. The Husband and Ballcocks
Many years ago I sent The Husband up into the attic to check on the ball cock in the header tank as it didn't seem to be filling up. I said 'look, don't touch'. He touched. An hour later, as I sat in the lounge feeding out new baby, I heard running water. 'Ah,' I thought, he's doing the washing up. A few minutes later I noticed he was, in fact, in the garden. So where was the running water coming from? I went into the hall to find water pouring down the stairs.
2. The Husband and Ladders
The house we were living in at the time had a suspended bay window from the underside of which I had noticed a lot of wasps. I told The Husband I would call the Council to deal with it as he had a history of nasty reactions to wasp stings. Did he listen? No he did not. He put an extending ladder up to the bay window and went up with some wasp killer to do it himself. Within minutes he had been stung and come over all peculiar. I saw him wobble down the ladder from the lounge window, where I was playing with The Boy, who was a crawling babe at the time. I told him to come in so I could give him some antihistamines but he insisted on putting the ladder away first. He unclipped the top section and pulled it down, not taking account of the fact that it was leaning up against the downstairs bay. As he retracted it the top the ladder smashed through the lounge window showering The Boy with broken glass. He was, fortunately, none the worse for it.
3. The Husband and Electric Fences
When we lived in France we had to put up some electric fencing to keep the ponies in. Posts were duly banged into the ground (without incident) and the electric tape attached. We had bought a heavy duty battery for it and The Husband was having some trouble getting the current to flow properly. After much cussing (from him) I decided to see if I could help. We checked the circuits to see if it was earthing anywhere but found nothing. In the end, The Husband redid all the connections, whacked the power up to maximum and flicked the switch. I shot about a foot in the air. He had forgotten to put the earth spike in the ground and hadn't noticed that I was leaning on it
4. The Husband and Chainsaws
Don't even ask!
5. The Husband and Spades
Today we decided to try and blitz the very overgrown garden. I had some extraneous aquilegias growing in the herb garden so I decided to move them into a bed we had just cleared out. I asked the husband to dig me a hole for the plants, not too big, I said. I went down to the herb garden to dig up the aquilegias. "Oh no!" I heard him shout. "What's the matter?" I called.
This is what the matter was......